Category Archives: Personal – Chris

July 22, 2011

Thoughts from a Down syndrome Dad

By Chris Lewis

Our Journey

I have been a father to Christopher (Topher) Michael Lewis for over 10 years. December 9, 2000 we had a beautiful baby boy. December 11, 2000 we learned that Topher had a heart condition that was only found in Down syndrome children.

Our lives were forever changed.

Recently, I ran across a new blog from Rick and Abbie Smith who are walking through some of the same things we did over a decade ago. Noah’s Dad dot com has been a huge inspiration to many people and as I read their story of Noah’s birth (it’s worth you time, but grab some Kleenex), it forced me to ask a question.

Why have I had so little to say about our journey with Topher?

I did a search on my blog and you can see that in 4 years of blogging there are only 2 posts that say anything about Down syndrome. One for Topher’s 7th and 8th birthdays respectively.

What’s up with that?

Support Systems

First, let me say that I am a huge fan of sites like Noah’s dad that offer insight into the experience. I wish there was that kind of availability when Tabitha and I were beginning our journey. For one thing, blogging was not a word in 2000. It would have resulted in one of those red, squiggly underlines from your spell check.

Secondly, every single situation, every child, and each disability is unique. No two are the same.

There is no such thing as normal. What is normal for us may be highly unusual for another family.

That’s why these kinds of sites and support systems are desperately needed. When we left the hospital with Topher, we left with the hospital with far more questions than answers and, quite frankly, the standard line people recited, ‘God only gives special kids to special people‘ was wearing thin by day 2! (I almost punched a well meaning deacon’s wife in the throat. If you’re reading this…I’m sorry.)

Thankfully, we did talk to A LOT to people who could relate and that was remarkably helpful. Even more so if we had been able to gain online access to share stories with other families.

Our Outlook

I have a son with Down syndrome. Even so, there are days that go by that the fact of Topher’s diagnosis NEVER crosses my mind. Seriously!

So, in one sense, I am not surprised that I have had little to say about our journey with Down syndrome.

But, we have an experience and a platform to share what God has shown, taught, and done through our walk with Topher. To keep it to ourselves would be selfish in some sense. Many of the people in our lives never get to see the beautiful, tiny ways God demonstrates his nature through our miracle son. So, Tabitha and I are going to begin to share more, to write more about this topic.

Why so little?

On the other hand, I think a lot can be learned from some of the reasons we probably haven’t written more before now. As I have wrestled with the question of why we haven’t had more to say, I have boiled it down to a few thoughts.

Here are some reasons we haven’t been more vocal about Down syndrome or our journey:

1) Our lives have not been defined by Down syndrome

2) We don’t treat Topher differently

3) We are blessed with a high functioning child

4) Early intervention works

I will be writing a follow up post on each of these areas over the next couple of weeks. If you are a family walking through this journey I hope they are helpful to you. If you know someone that is experiencing the unfolding of this kind of news, I hope it will give you some insight.

Above all, I hope we can see the glory of God revealed in the most surprising ways. I hope we can learn together that God really doesn’t make mistakes. I hope we can see that even when things seem dark and answers distant, the God of this universe is holding you in the palm of His hands. I hope it stirs your soul to know that Jesus knows what it is to walk where you are walking.

The verdict is in. God is good.

Even when we can’t see how.

He’s still good.

6 comments   |  tags: , , | posted in Down syndrome, Down syndrome journey, Family, Miracles, My Thoughts - Chris, Personal - Chris

May 11, 2011

A new commitment

By Chris Lewis

Time.

Limited. Finite. Precious.

We all struggle with making the decisions on what we try to cram into the 86,400 seconds we get each day. About 25,000 of those fly by while you sleep. Another 28,000 go to your job, if you work. My wife and I average 10,000 seconds dropping off and picking up the kids! You’ll spend about 120 seconds reading this post.

So, if I began to itemize my to do list and tell you all the reasons why my blogging has decreased, one of two things would happen. One, it may immediately remind you of how busy you are and prompt comparative, or maybe even resentful, thoughts about your’s being bigger than mine (your list).  Or, on the off chance my words found a sympathetic ear with you, it would immediately beg the question: so why are you doing it?

I’m so glad you asked!

I need to write. Probably more than I need to do a lot of other things and definitely more than you need to read what I write. Nonetheless, it’s an exercise that I miss and I have purposed to make it a priority again.

I am going to take a different approach to blogging than I have in the past. I am becoming more intentional with the content that I post.

Here’s my commitment: ONE post per week. Specifically, one ‘devotional-type‘ post every week – usually on Thursdays. Additionally, I am planning on sharing periodic thoughts on my journey with church planting, family stuff, and the occasional message specifically for Revolution Church.

Bottom line: I want this blog to become an extension of me. What is God revealing to me in His Word? What is He teaching me along the way? How do I glimpse God in and through my family?

I promise to be transparent and real. Some of the stuff on here may be pretty raw. I do not promise to have all my thoughts flushed out before posting. That’s what editors are for and I don’t have one.

It’s sure to be good for me and my hope is that there will be some nuggets of value for you to walk away with too.

Thanks for investing your 120 seconds. I’ll do my best not to waste them!

“What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.” – James 4:14

Leave a comment   |  tags: , , , | posted in My Thoughts - Chris, Personal - Chris

January 25, 2011

Look what I made!

By Chris Lewis

“Daddy, look what I made!” That’s what my 8 year old daughter said as she ran into the den this past Sunday to show me this creation she had been working on.

My nephew had been over and he had this really, really, really cool Lego model of an X-Wing fighter from Star Wars.

I made a big deal out of it with my nephew, and Gracie couldn’t wait to show me what she could do with the toys she got from her Zaxby’s kids meal. She didn’t have the same tools to work with as my nephew, so she couldn’t duplicate his creation.

What she ended up with was several objects randomly clipped together (that were originally intended to build a bicycle) in an effort to form this spaceship with lasers that would shoot in every direction at the same time, with sensors to pick up any enemy ships approaching.

It was AWESOME! As her dad, I was proud of her effort. As an intergalactic spacecraft inspector…well…it left a little to be desired.

I was so proud of her efforts and made a big show of it. She beamed…and then…I showed her how to use the materials she had to build what they were intended to be. She was able to make a bicycle AND a person to ride it. They looked natural and all the pieces fit together – like they were meant to. She lit up when she saw the pieces fit together as they were designed to do.

That’s when it hit me.

God brought this verse to my mind from Eph 2:10 “For we are his workmanship (masterpiece in NLT), created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.“

We spend so much time as believers, trying to build or create our own masterpieces, all the while overlooking the fact that we are already his masterpiece! We waste resources and gifts in an effort to duplicate someone else’s work or mimic an individual we admire, rather than realizing God has declared YOU his handiwork (NIV).

Is he finished yet? I hope not. But if we are his, then we are his to build.

He planned you and what you would become beforehand and just like my daughter learned, when we try to be something other than we were designed to be, we end up looking awkward and out of place.

As our Father, God may smile at our efforts, but I’m certain the desire of his heart is that we embrace who he created us to be – and walk in that!

Who has God created you to be?

2 comments | posted in Devotional thought, Family, My Thoughts - Chris, Personal - Chris

December 2, 2010

For this reason…

By Chris Lewis

…”a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” - Gen 2:24

15 years ago today I said, “I do” to Tabitha Yvonne Carlton and she became Mrs. Christopher Michael Lewis.

I thought I “did”.

And I guess I did…as well as I knew how to at the time.

Fine wines aren’t the only thing that get better with age. Marriage can be a living, breathing, growing entity that – if nurtured properly – will grow and mature into a healthy experience of what we say to each other on that day.

I loved Tabitha on that day. But it was only a miniature deposit on the love God had for us in the years to come. Love that would grow as we wrestled through the tensions that come with better or worse, richer or poorer, sickness and health. Love that more times than not was patient and kind…didn’t envy or boast…was humble in most of its ways…made compromises when the situation called for it…erased the record of past wrongs…rejoiced in truth (1 Cor 13:4-6).

I have made many mistakes in this journey – and I will make more to be sure. But I am so thankful to God for blessing me with the wife he chose for me. My prayer is that I would be the husband and shepherd I am called to be to my wife before anyone else.

For those of you reading who have already reached your dairy quota, you will definitely want to tune out for this next part.

Tabitha,

You have given me so much these past 15 years together. You are the most godly person I know and I am inspired by your walk with Jesus. You are my chief helper. My biggest encourager. My most honest and trusted critic. You are my best friend. Thank you for loving me well.

With everything I have I promise to always give you the best of me. Until the day I take my last breath, I will remain…

…forever yours.

I love you with my soul.

Chris

I can’t wait for the next 15!

1 comment | posted in Personal - Chris

May 3, 2010

Stretching and stirring

By Chris Lewis

Have you ever walked through a season in your life where you have been stretched in areas you thought you were finished being stretched?

I am finding myself in one of those times right now and it is altogether beautiful and entirely terrifying at the same time. God is stretching me in areas of faith and stirring my spirit to seek Him for a fresh experience.

Paul compares the life of the believer to an athlete (1 Cor 9:24-26 and 2 Tim 2:4-6). Just like an athlete experiences the pain of training as muscles are stretched to new boundaries, so the believer encounters similar discomfort as the spiritual muscles are taken beyond the last point they were tested. Without this component, there is no growth.

You can maintain. But you cannot grow.

Growth requires stretching. It demands it.

So stop resisting. Lean into the new challenge in front of you. Engage the contest before you knowing it is the very doorway to your growth.

Henry Blackaby said it is impossible for your faith to grow unless God takes you beyond the point your faith was last tested (paraphrase). We so often pray for God to get us through something when what we ought to pray is God grow me through this.

1 comment | posted in My Thoughts - Chris, Personal - Chris

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